“God values the sanctity of marriage, but not more than the safety and sanity of the individuals in it.” Leslie Vernick
I think author and counselor Leslie Vernick has some great advice, experience and counsel for women in destructive relationships. I recommend her book and website on my Helpful Resources page. In her excellent post below, she provides a plethora of scriptures supporting separation from an abusive, unrepentant, sinning spouse.
Scripture Supports for Separation from a Destructive Spouse
The Scripture that most people use to discuss grounds for Biblical separation is 1 Corinthians 7:10 where Paul writes, “To the married I give this charge (not I, but the Lord), the wife should not separate from her husband (but if she does, she should remain unmarried or else be reconciled to her husband), and the husband should not divorce his wife.”
I’ve reposted a great article on emotional abuse and the church that I found on the website A Cry for Justice. (Many thanks to Barbara and Jeff at that site for educating people on abuser’s tactics and teaching an interesting perspective on what scripture says about abuse, marriage and divorce.) In the article linked below, author Amy Widman White lists several traits of an emotionally abusive husband. She states “The key motivational factor that defines an emotionally abusive person is a deep-seated need to be in control. Because of the abuser’s insecurities, feelings of inadequacy, and distorted beliefs about women and marriage, he feels he must control his wife or lose her. The abuser will use manipulative and heavy-handed tactics to keep his wife off balance. For example, the abuser may resort to: